goodbye

i'm leaving so many things behind.
i'm leaving my clothes
i'm leaving my cozy little room
i'm leaving my massive collection of books and papers
i'm leaving the comfort of my house
i'm leaving the swing
i'm leaving the computer
i'm leaving you.

i don't want to go.
i don't want to leave.
i don't want to feel this way.
i don't want to go without you.
i don't want to feel helpless like this.
i don't want to say goodbye.
i don't want to leave.
i don't want to cry.

sometimes
i wish i can just close my eyes
and when i open them again
i'll be back.
and you'll be there with me.
and we'll laugh
and we'll have fun
and we'll never leave each other's presence.
sometimes how i wish you were here.
i wish for so much.

we had some good times, didn't we?
i relive those
every time it gets too quiet.
i surround myself with images of you
i'm delusional
because i swear i could feel you right here
and smell your scent
and hear your voice.
i'd take you with me if i could.

thanks for listening and all your time.
i'm not worth as much as you think i am.
that's only as much as i can be.
goodbye, now.
goodbye.
i hope to see...
goodbye, now.
goodbye.

and tears up at the coffee shop
with dreams of being in a band
and music in his life.
goodbye.
i pray.
i pray now.
goodbye, now.
goodbye.